When I Was A Postgraduate

When I was a postgraduate in the university, one very beautiful girl was also studying the same subjects as me.
For two years we remained studying the same subjects – philosophy, religion and
psychology – and then finally we had to depart.
She was a rich girl, the daughter of the collector of the city. I had gone out. Her car was waiting – and perhaps she was also waiting; there was no need for her to sit inside the car and wait.
It took two years for her to say to me, ”I have been very much frustrated. I wanted you to say to me, ‘I love you.’”
I said, ”Love is not an expectation; and if it is an expectation, frustration is bound to happen.”
Why does the whole world look so frustrated?
For the simple reason that you have so many expectations.
I told the girl, ”What you are saying today you should have told me the first time you started feeling love towards me.”
She said, ”The gone is gone; we cannot go back to the past. But this is my last day in the city. I was staying with my father here, because he is the collector, but my whole family lives in New Delhi.
By the evening I will be gone.
So I gathered courage and asked you, ‘I love you.
Can you not promise me that whenever you will love I should be given the priority?’”
I said, ”I cannot promise about the future – the future is absolutely unknown.
I cannot even promise for tomorrow or the next moment.”
To me, promising shows the retardedness of the mind.
Every promise is going to be a trouble because you are unaware of a simple fact: the future is absolutely unknown.
Where you will land tomorrow nobody knows.
Any promise is irreligious, because it shows a stupid mind that cannot understand the future.
 
OshO

Whenever You Do Something Good

Whenever you do something good, do it out of love – not out of duty.
I used to go to many clubs to speak.
In one Rotary Club they had a motto, which was placed just in front of me, ‘We serve.’ I had not
gone to speak to them about service, but I said, ”Now I have forgotten what I had come for.
I am going to speak about this motto that is in front of me in golden letters, ‘We serve.’
If you are aware of your service, it is not service; it is a very cunning way of
enslaving the other person.
To me, duty is a four-letter, ugly word – obscene.”
Never do anything out of the idea of duty, because it means you are forcing yourself,
it means you are fulfilling a certain demand from the other side,
it means you are following a certain discipline taught by the society to you.
Only act out of love.
Then only your act is beautiful and is a blessing.
You should do things not to be rewarded, not to be remembered, not to have people be grateful to you.
You should do because you enjoy doing – and your reward is complete,
beyond your action you are not expecting anything... otherwise even the best act becomes ugly

OshO

Why Do I Want People to Admire Me

Question :- WHY DO I WANT PEOPLE TO ADMIRE ME?

Answer :-
One wants to be admired because one has no respect for oneself.

We are brought up with guilt feelings deeply rooted in us. From the very beginning we are condemned by the parents, by the teachers, by the priests, by the politicians, by the whole establishment.

A single note is continuously repeated to every child: that ’Whatsoever you are doing is not right.

You are doing what should not be done and you are not doing what should be done.’

Every child is given directly and indirectly
the impression that he is not really wanted, that his parents are tired, that he is being somehow tolerated, that he is a nuisance.

This creates a deep wound in every person, and a rejection of oneself arises.

To cover up that wound we expect
admiration, admiration is a compensation.

If you respect yourself that is more than
enough; if you love yourself there is no need for any admiration, there is no desire at all, because once you start expecting admiration from others you start compromising with them.

You have to fulfil their expectations, only then will they admire you. You have to be according to their dictates, you cannot live a life of freedom.

You become crippled and paralysed, you become retarded, you don’t grow up.

You become so afraid of your own self that you are constantly on guard, because you know if you allow yourself you are bound to do something wrong.

Because all that you have ever done was labelled wrong and now there is a trembling inside. You cannot depend on yourself, you have to depend on others.

This is a very psychological strategy to create slavery.

Condemn the person in his own eyes and he will remain dependent on others.

OshO